A few nights ago while I was putting together the Business Casual post from last week, I found a post I did about two years ago entitled Outtakes & Plans. It was surreal to say the least! It was surreal to see my hair so short. I remember that the day after graduation (and of having super long hair during the duration of my high school career), I went and chopped off my locks. It was an act of starting afresh, a transformative measure to guide me in my new collegiate adventure.
It was surreal to see outtakes for my Cubicle Fancy series I did two summers ago (about remixing pieces of my wardrobe in order to make them professional). I had just graduated high school and had gotten my first real summer job (through pulled strings by my mother) at a dentist's office as a part receptionist, part scanner, filer, change-maker, lunch orderer/picker-upper and professional document shredder. Though I enjoyed making money and spending my days doing something other than sitting at home, I realized that I hated the mundane path I had forced myself on. I nervously called my university and changed my major before I had even started college. I dropped my safe English major and changed it to Art with a focus in Visual Design. This made me so excited for my future.
It's also surreal to see how tiny Jack was! At this point he was one years old, only a few days from turning two. It's so strange to think about him being so little, I can hardly remember it. Even then, he was crashing my 'photoshoots' which is no different than now. He's gone from baby to big boy so quickly. He was THE cutest little thing and he remains to be the cutest. Being away from him hurts my heart. He is truly my favorite person ever. At this point two years ago, I was just preparing to be away from him for the first time. I was gliding about in a fantasy world full of pseudo-independence and dorm room planning. I was naive in a lot of ways. Leaving him here in such a short time maybe be the hardest yet.
Thank you for letting my share our silly unedited outtakes and let me reminisce a little bit. I think reminiscing can be great, and even healthy. Things change constantly and I'm just trying to take it in stride. I've grown so much in these past two years, in some ways I have grown leaps and bounds and in others, I have only grown minutely. What's important to me is that I continue to grow and aspire and plan.
Though there are many amazing, exciting and different things that await me in this next school year, it feels good to hit pause - if only for a second.
